Amputee

Saturday.

Saturday morning I hurriedly ran around two shops childless getting all that I needed as quickly as possible. Inc. 3 deep brown curtains for our lounge room.

As I got home I was excited to see how the new curtains would transform our lounge in color & texture. 1/4 the way through hanging these things one of the children slammed the front door shut. Michael was getting ready to leave for the gym.

I knew that bubba had crawled out the door. Not wanting her to crawl further away and down two dangerous steps to land head down on concrete I immediately opened the door.

As I looked down she was kneeling. Bouncing on her knees with blood over her hand, chest & mouth.
Not knowing what had happened but knowing she was hurt I picked her up bringing her to my chest and searching for the source of blood. I couldn't see a problem in her mouth straight away but she was trying to put her hand in their and was obviously still crying.

Then I saw it.
Part of her finger was missing. I could see white dots on the inside and knew it wasn't good and a trip to the emergency was required.
In record time the kids were in the car (dressed, pjs, no nappy changes, half dressed - bubba was in a nappy & bib) and we were headed to get help with a baby crying on my lap.

Yelling out to Michael for help the children began asking questions.

I had to hold her wrist so she couldn't put it in her mouth or touching anything other than her own hand by curling her fingers into the palm.

I kept thinking if I wasn't putting the curtains up it wouldn't have happened, or if the door was shut, or I should have grabbed her before she crawled out, or the child shouldn't have shut the door or.........

Michael dropped us off at the ed door and went to park the car and bring the kids in.

The ed was busy. I told the lady that my baby had just got her finger cut off and she let me straight through. Without even taking names and details. (Apologies if you were waiting).

The rest was a bit of a blur really.

The drone of the nurses voices become one and all I heard was a mumble. I was in shock and stayed that way til night.

Michael came in. After a little while I realised that my surrounds were too quiet and not the usual busy activity. Where were my kids?

On the way into the ed Michael's mum came out & took the three of my children home with her. How was that for timing?? She had been visiting someone else there.

The Dr assured me that her finger skin will grow this and that way and re-form that part of her finger but it will take about 3+ weeks to do so. In the meantime we need to keep it cleaned and bandaged.

She had managed to miss her bone. Just. And her nail. Just. And the first join. just. So it was the chubby ball part of her little finger.

Whilst she is fortunate that it wasn't more serious she has been in a lot of pain. They've given her painstop which has coedine and not recommended under 12months.
She has to get her hand redressed daily at ambulatory care.

The children were asking questions. How will she eat? Did her finger get cut off? Will she die? Who did it? Where is her finger? Is it in the door still?

Understandably she doesn't like her hand being touched. Especially without the bandage on.
Sunday morning she pulled her bandage off so we had to take another ed trip so her hand doesn't get dirty & infected. She hated it.

Being an extremely active baby I bought her a 'baby walker' to try get her off the ground. Or atleast some of the time.

When we got home I actually did find her finger and peeled it off the door jam. She lost quite a chunk if it.

I am so glad that it wasn't worse. That it was just the fatty part of her finger, that it missed the bone, that it wasn't her whole finger or hand.
I am thankful for a lot of things really. So as I gear up for another day on my own with all the kids ill try not to think of all the emotions that came with it.