Come to the Dark Side, We Have Breast Milk AND Cookies

So excited about this guest post from Karen Orchard.  In addition to being a great writer, she is a home-birthing, breastfeeding, cloth diapering PHARMACIST!  She also does some cool things with yarn (links can be found at the bottom of her cleverly written post).

Honestly, I was never much of a Star Wars fan.  Star Trek was where it's at for me.  The entire pursuing knowledge for the sake of discovery is more my style.  Ideas and learning motivate me.

I want to share with you how someone as unlikely as myself would turn into a home-birthing, extended breast feeding, and cloth diapering mama.

Berry Patch Mama - The Pharmacist 

Actually, I think me becoming a pharmacist is stranger than me becoming everything else I am.  Yes, you read that right, I am a pharmacist.  Honestly, I know perhaps one other pharmacist who gave birth without an epidural and insisted on taking breaks at work for an entire year to pump.  I am a strange bird in my habitat.  Most other pharmacists I know gave up on pumping after a week.  Not me!  I viewed it as my right, my baby's right.  Don't mess with Mama Bear!  I didn't back down, even when ten years ago my district manager wouldn't arrange a private place for me to pump.  My solution?  I sat in the corner out of view of customers, facing the wall.  It was a terrifying thought at first, but it became a routine and my coworkers got used to it.  Luckily they were all female.

Honestly, I'd never really wanted children.  I'd never thought much about it, which might have been a good thing.  My head wasn't filled with all sorts of cliched and romantic notions or dramatic portrayals from movies and TV.  Our families shape many of our ideas about things, especially child rearing.  Perhaps it was something of a blessing I was an only child for 7 years.  I had not a single cousin until I was 6!  I was never around other babies or children.  I hadn't all that much to 'go off of'.  As far as medications,  I came from a family where aspirin was the strongest analgesic in the house.  You didn't go to the doctor unless it was serious.  My father routinely believed he could think himself out of a cold.  The man never missed a day of work.  I didn't know any pharmacists and my parents weren't in the medical professions.

My mother was a woman ahead of her time.  She claims it was all the Phil Donahue she watched.  She was determined to have a natural birth and breastfeed in the early 70s, when people weren't doing any of those things, including having children.  You know, the whole Population Bomb thing and all had just come out.  Mom remembers there were no maternity clothes to be found in the department stores.  Modern women were liberated, you didn't need to breastfeed.  Be a modern woman, use formula! Working 9 to 5 and all that.

So, why the heck would I even become a pharmacist?  Poor guidance counseling for one.  I didn't know any pharmacists and my parents weren't in the medical professions.  It was ultimately my love of science and my practicality of wanting a steady, secure pay check.  Originally, I intended to go into pharmaceutical research and development, but I sure am glad I don't work for a pharmaceutical company now.  Maybe that's what makes me different.  I entered into pharmacy under the naive notion that science and concrete facts were what lies behind the pharmaceutical industry.  I think we all know what drives the pharmaceutical industry and health care these days, but 25 years ago in high school I wasn't so enlightened.  As you can imagine I am a tiny bit disillusioned now by it.

When I became pregnant 11 years ago I embarked on my usual strategy to deal with everything.  Research!  I love investigation, research,the thrill of the hunt.  I visited message boards (we were pre-blog and Facebook back in those days).  I found one for Attachment Parenting.  A term I had never, ever heard in my life.  I found it very fascinating and very reasonable.  It made sense!  That's what I like.  You see, I question everything.  I'll never accept anything without knowing the "why".  Then I found the Mother of all Attachment Parenting communities, Mothering.com (pun intended).  I was hooked!  I studied.  I read books.  Not cream puff books, like "What to Expect When You're Expecting".  I read Sheila Kitzinger, Laura Shanley, and Ina May Gaskin.  Unassisted Childbirth really made an impression on me.  I never did have an unassisted birth, but the book is just amazing!

The world would be a much better place if truth and fact were the highest of our pursuits.  If exploring strange new worlds and boldly going where no one has gone befo-....  oh I did mention I am a little bit of a Star Trek TNG fan.  That's the sort of scientific pursuits and world I'd have liked to live in.  I thought someday I'd be Dr. Beverly Crusher.  However, this isn't the 23rd century.

Really, we aren't that far removed from bleeding people, drilling holes in people's skulls, and the invention of antiseptic.  200 years ago doctors warned not to bathe too often, or else you may let the 'bad airs' in through your pores!  Ridiculous, isn't it?  Yet today, we aren't that much more sophisticated.  There is a plethora of standard protocols in hospitals based on little to no scientific evidence or good reason.  Most hospital procedures are based on mitigating liability, not science or medicine.  True story.  In light of that, I think you, as a lay person, should keep in mind that the medical profession doesn't have the best track record on sound, reasonable advice based on scientific fact.  If it doesn't make sense to you, ask "why?".  If you don't get a answer that makes sense, do some investigative work and find out the truth.

Above all things, I think the truth about things is the most important thing for me.  I won't hide behind ideology, or political correctness, or popular opinion, or "because that's the way we've always done it.  That's why I believe in natural birthing and all the other things I believe in.  Because they are  reasonable, rational, and logical.  Live long and prosper and have a great birth!

Oh hey, PS, I just discovered a woman pharmacist I work with is due this weekend and it's her second birth at the local Midwife Birthing Center!  When she told me I believe I did a fist pump and exclaimed "Oh yeah!"

Karen Orchard  

BerryPatchMama on Facebook

BerryPatchMama blog

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More No Poo! - The Curly Cut

Are you sick of this topic yet?!  OK, one more post.

I cheated on my hair dresser I've seen for 8 years and went for my curly cut with someone else.  (I'll get to that part of the story in a minute.)  Yes, she cut it dry and then washed it and styled it.  Now, you may know this, but I did not.  I discovered there really are No-Poo products made by Deva Curl. Like a great-smelling cleanser and conditioner and gels.  (I sell Scentsy and am obsessed with the way things smell.  This is huge.) I love them!  I must admit, however, I like the way my hair felt with the apple cider vinegar rinse - not quite so soft - and easier to hold, if that makes sense at all.  Yes, I like the curly cut and she showed me a few tricks to make it fuller at the root - using clips to dry it.  I never ever use a blow dryer except on my bangs, so this has been an adjustment for me.  If you are in Ft. Worth, I'd definitely recommend the Curly Cut at The Curly Tree.

The story that goes with the curly cut is quite humorous.

If you know me at all, you know how nervous I've been to cheat on my hair dresser.  I've seen the same woman for 8 years!  She's been with me through many Tim McGraw shows and appearances, 3 TV spots, and the regular every-6-weeks color appointments.  We know each other.  We do the same thing at nearly every appointment.  So to make an appointment with anyone else....  Well, it felt like total betrayal.

I had my curly cut on a Friday.  My color appointment was scheduled for Tuesday.  She always calls and reminds us of our appointments on Monday. When she called, she immediately went into this long story about a dream she had woke up to that morning about how I had gone somewhere else for a cut and color.  I cut my hair super short, like 2" - I looked like a boy - and did my hair this funky color.  In the dream I was begging her to fix it.  I told her I was trying to do what was popular by "peppering" my hair. (?????)  She was so upset and wondering what she had done to make me go somewhere else...

Silence...

So, I had to tell her I actually did go somewhere else for the curly cut.  More silence.  Oh my heck.  It was awful.  And awkward. The rest of the conversation was quite strained as she asked about the cut.  While I could be wrong, I sensed some defensiveness, too.

You better believe my hair looked AWESOME when I went in for my appointment the next morning.  Usually I show up in a baseball hat.  I wanted her to see that this was a good move for me and my hair.  She had had 24 hours to think about it and was not defensive, but complimentary. Actually, she went on and on about how great it looked.  Whew!

This is the same hair dresser that has hated the no-poo thing from day one. But over the last 15 months, she has admitted that my hair is healthier and doing great.  Despite that, she still does not fully support my no-poo lifestyle.  Until...  Her sales rep she buys products from was in her office collecting orders when I was putting my plop on my head.  She saw that I was using the Deva Curl gel and said she sells those products too.  She admitted that she uses No-Poo too.  All of sudden, I wasn't a freak in the eyes of my hair dresser!  I used to spend a lot of money with her on color shampoo and now she is back in business. It was all about the timing, I guess.

I could go on about the parallels between breaking up with your OB and the similarities to breaking up with your hair lady.  I know this cut is better, but it was very hard.  I like my hair lady, but I need something different now, now that I have more information about how to handle my curly hair. Information I didn't have before. Frankly, you can draw your own analogy here.  I'm too dang tired.

I have 2 hair ladies now.  One for color, one for the curly cut.  They both complimented the job the other is doing.  All is well.  The end.

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No Poo - Revisited

Let's talk No Poo again. It's been 13 months since I've regularly used shampoo.  I get lots of questions about  how it's going. Time for an update.

In case you have no idea what I'm talking about, here is  original post.  My recipe is there, too.

My hairdresser has finally gotten used to my routine and has admitted that my hair and scalp are much healthier.  This is my routine now:

I'm only using the baking soda mixture followed with the apple cider vinegar mixture about twice a month now.  My scalp is almost never itchy any more. When I used shampoo, by about day 3 to 5, it felt a little itchy.  Remember, my hair is super dry.  I have no oil.  At all.  I can easily get away with this.  Side note:  I never did find the aloe vera to add to my ACV rinse.  Oh well.

When I need to "start over" with my hair, I just do a cold rinse, scruntch in my conditioner, followed up with squeezing in some clear gel.  I squeeze and scrunch it until no water comes out.

The very important "plop"

Then, I add my plop.  My version, which seems to be working for me, is to use a big t-shirt and lay it out flat.  I tip my head upside-down, place all my hair at the top of my head, then twist and wrap both sides of the shirt, tucking it in to the back of the t-shirt/towel.  I look like Princess Leah with the plop on my head. I leave it on as long as possible, even a couple of hours.  The longer, the curlier.

The only thing I use the blow dryer for is my bangs.  Some people use a diffuser, but I don't.  I just let my hair air dry.  I try not to touch it much while it's drying, but if I do, it's just to scrunch it.

My hairdresser says not to tell anyone this because it'll put her out of business, but she said that my color stays better and that my hair feels really different - better. I think it kills her to admit that because she was so opposed to me doing No Poo.

I was so intimidated in the beginning of my No Poo journey because I wanted to know exactly when to do the rinses, what formulas, etc.  Everyone told me to give it time and I'd figure out what works and what doesn't.  They were right.  I've met a couple of people that have done No Poo for a long time and they have been helpful with different techniques and tips.

Curlier to the root & more volume

Just this week I learned of a place in Ft. Worth called The Curly Tree.  She does a curly haircut when your hair is DRY, not wet.  I'm totally going.  I feel like I'm cheating on my hairdresser (we've been together for almost 8 years!), but as one of the no-pooers said to me, it's like leaving your OB for someone better for you.  I have more anxiety over the possibility of leaving my hairdresser than I ever did over leaving my OB!

People always ask me about doing No Poo when they have oily hair.  I really don't know.  The only reason I do it - do I dare admit, with a Diet Mountain Dew in hand - that I couldn't care less about the chemicals?  I just heard that the No Poo makes your hair curlier.  That's why I do it.  If I had straight oily hair, I wouldn't care about No Poo.

Yes, it's true, I'm not crunchy.  Maybe chewy.  Maybe.

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Colloidal Silver, Ionic Silver, or Nano-Silver -- Your Questions Answered

As promised, here is the guest blog post by Dr. Betsy Taylor of Grand Prairie, TX.  She is a member of the Tarrant County Birth Network and I've heard her speak on chiropractic and also on nutrition and taking care of the body.  She has been the Silver "guru" I've gone to with all my questions.

My personal experience with the ASAP Silver has been this:  no one in my family has been on antibiotics since starting the Silver one-and-a-half years ago.  I have not used my inhaler since starting the silver.  We've used it for sore throats, coughs, ears, eyes, and generally when anyone starts feeling sick, we start taking our Silver.  I am a believer.  I hope you find the answer to your questions.  Thank you, Dr. Taylor, for helping us understand how we can use Silver to promote health and well being in our own families.

"I am a Doctor of Chiropractic so I need to do this disclaimer: the following is not intended as a substitute for the advice and or/medical care of your physician, nor is it meant to discourage or dissuade you from the advice of your physician.

As I researched material for this post, I was really shocked to find so much controversy. But in reality, I am not surprised.  Big Pharma cannot make money from the therapeutic use of silver so the 'powers that be' debunk it. The FDA supports the government's and the pharmaceutical's stand - doesn't work, can hurt you, no safety studies, no science - you see where I am going. The same blah, blah, blah they spout over other natural, healing therapies. If we claim that silver "cures", then the FDA classifies it as a 'drug' and it then must be tested and controlled by them with standardization, quality control, and extensive medical testing.

Silver is already used in the medical world in silver nitrate - used in newborn's eyes to prevent infection; and in silver sulfadiazine - used in dressings for burns to prevent infections. NASA uses it for water purification. Therefore, when you look at the current accepted uses, you can easily see what it can be used for - an antimicrobial - microbes being bacteria, viruses, fungus. Studies show that it works. You can research these online. 

Silver is a metal and a mineral.(1)   It can be toxic under certain circumstances and can be therapeutic under certain circumstances.   My intent here is to help you know the difference. Silver has been used throughout history for therapeutic measures. I'll let you do the research on that too.

For purposes of this article, we will be talking about nutritional tissue deficiencies of silver and how balancing this deficiency may improve your health.

Most of you will be familiar with the term colloidal silver or ionic silver. Colloidal refers to the size and suspension in water, and ionic refers to the positive charge of the particle. It is the size of the particle that makes it usable in the tissues, and the positive charge that makes it a germicide/antimicrobial.  This type of silver can be made at home. However, here is where the problems arise.

As with most chemistry, all parts of the procedure must be correct. If not, there can be problems. I am sure you have heard of the 'blue man' whose skin and gums turned blue from ingesting silver. The truth behind this is that he made his own, and took mega doses for a long time. His homemade silver was improperly made resulting in particles that were too large which joined with other particles in his water. These compounds were then deposited in his tissues. True, pure, properly prepared silver does not do this. Therefore, I do not recommend making your own. But I do recommend knowing how and having the equipment on hand in case the FDA ever takes it away from us. Just do it properly.

Science and chemistry aside, let's get to the questions!

How does it work? The chemical reaction when the silver particles come in contact with microbes causes cell death. Silver is then eliminated from the body via normal elimination routes. Studies show it does not affect good cells - a major difference with antibiotics! Nor does it appear to result in silver-resistant strains of microbes. Nature is just too smart for that. The way antibiotics (toxic chemicals) work on the microbes has enabled these critters to 'mutate' and become drug resistant. Interaction with natural silver particles is a different mechanism, so no mutations.

Is it safe? Yes. Properly prepared silver products are non-toxic. The silver is utilized and then eliminated just like extra calcium, magnesium, zinc, etc. They are also non-allergenic, unless you are allergic to silver, then you would avoid it. To test - place a small drop on a tiny band-aid and place on the wrist overnight - if there is a skin reaction - avoid it. Again, silver compounds (like silver nitrate or silver sulfadiazine) should only be used while strictly following directions specifically for that product. Do not confuse those products with colloidal silver. In the homeopathic world there are reported possible side effects, so I would not use silver with homeopathic medications. These possible side effects are not life-threatening or even dangerous, but it is sensible to avoid the combination. The only toxicity problem I found was the blue tint to tissues known as argyria - rare and self-induced. There is a small chance you can have a healing crisis or an increase in symptoms while healing also. With regards to children - if you would take it yourself you might choose to give it to your children. With regards to pregnancy - I would not recommend it. Overall, just be sensible - even water can be toxic or beneficial to your health.  Please research the safety studies.

The official definition of heavy metal poisoning is:
“Any functional or morphologic change in the kidney produced by an ingested, injected, inhaled, or absorbed drug, chemical, or biologic agent.”
You would be wise to check out this truthful record of the real causes of heavy metal poisoning. The most correct and widely accepted authority on the subject is the professional tome of “MERCK Manual Of Diagnosis And Treatment”. Now in its 17th edition, page 1880 of the manual gives the complete list of heavy metals that can cause heavy metal poisoning. While this list does include several beneficial metals like copper and iron that are found in everyday vitamins, metallic silver is not listed in any of its forms. It isn’t like this is some sudden new discovery and silver just has not yet been added to the list in some future 18th edition printing. No error has been made here; natural silver solution products do not cause heavy metal poisoning! Silver is not on the list because it is not, nor ever was a cause of this infliction. (2)

How do I use it? The first time I was introduced to and used colloidal silver I placed it straight in my eyes. I had cellulitis for 10 days and it cleared it up 100% within 36 hours. I therefore am not afraid to use it at all. It can be used topically on the skin, sprayed up the nose, drops in the ears, and held in the mouth for absorption, then swallowed. Most products have no taste so it is easy to ingest. If it must be mixed with fluids or gels it will still work, but may be somewhat less effective. Again, use of this product is to balance the mineral deficiency of the tissues to increase the tissue's ability to fight invaders and to heal.

What is the dosage? That depends on the situation. I would follow the directions on the bottle for mild, double for moderate, and saturate for 2-3 days for severe. When I saturate, I take 1 tsp. every waking hour.  After doing additional research for this article, and with my experience with silver, I do not recommend it every day. (There are some exceptions to this.) I have found it works great when needed for a specific, symptomatic imbalance.

What product do I recommend? I recommend ASAP Silver by American Biotech Labs.(3)   This is a new 'nano-silver' (SilverSol©) which has multiple modes of action and is effective until eliminated from the body. Regular colloidal silver particles must come in contact with the microbe and then are inactive. The nano-silver particles become part of the structure of the water and therefore do not have to touch the microbe making it faster and more effective. This promotes the action of a balanced and healthy tissue defending itself.  My next recommendation would be Nature’s Sunshine Silver Shield.(4)   It is a colloidal silver.

Herbs, vitamins, minerals, clays, foods, etc. all are natural aids in improving the body's function to heal and be healthier. Silver is just another tool in the toolbox to use. It does an excellent job when used properly."

(1)   http://www.chelatedtraceminerals.com/chelated_trace_minerals.html

(2)   http://blog.supernaturalsilver.com/your-health-and-silver-sol/the-truth-silver-supplements-and-heavy-metal-poisoning/

(3)  http://www.americanbiotechlabs.com/aboutUs.phphttp://www.americanbiotechlabs.com/aboutUs.php

(4)    http://www.naturessunshine.com/us/product/silver-shield-waqua-sol-18-ppm-4-fl-oz/sku4274.aspxhttp://www.naturessunshine.com/us/product/silver-shield-waqua-sol-18-ppm-4-fl-oz/sku4274.aspx

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My "No Poo" Story

If you don't know about "No Poo" by now, you are so out of it!  After Mama Birth's absolute disgust, we all were intrigued, right?  I had actually heard of the No Poo thing on a DFW Holistic Facebook group I'm a part of and knew just enough to be dangerous.  The fact that Mama Birth was so grossed out just made me more excited to do it!

OK, so I read quite a bit of blogs about it, and I'm not going to lie to you -- I was pretty overwhelmed with all the recipes.  The woman that does my hair has told me that of 400 clients, she only has one other person with hair like mine.  For the record, she's totally grossed out by what I am doing.

My hair is very dry and as a result, I always go about 5 days between washings.  Otherwise, I have no oil whatsoever.  I guess I was doing the No Poo thing and didn't realize it was a movement.  I haven't gotten the "Curly Girl" book yet and I do not claim to be an expert by any means.  I've only been doing this for about 2 weeks, but I'm hooked!

Everyone has their reasons for doing the No Poo thing.  It seems like a lot of people are concerned with the chemicals in shampoo, but I'll admit, I really couldn't care less about that.  What I was reading, the people with wavy or curly hair reported their hair getting curlier, had more volume, and their hair was curling all the way to the root.  That was enough for me!

This is what I have been doing:

"Shampoo" is just baking soda.  Most recipes said to add a tablespoon to 8 oz of water.  I did that the first time, but I have so much hair, I decided to just use baking soda in my palm an add a titch of water.  I massage that into my scalp and then rinse.

My "Conditioner" step is a little more complicated.  In a mason jar, I mix the following:
* 1/4 cup apple cider vinegar
* 3/4 cup water
* 1 Tablespoon honey
* 8 drops Tea Tree Oil
* 8 drops Peppermint Oil

The recipe calls for a tablespoon of food grade aloe vera gel, but I haven't bought any yet.  I've been happy even without it, but I am anxious to try it with it.

I pour it on my scalp and work it through my hair, all the way to the ends.  I leave it on for about a minute and then rinse.  I read about "plopping," but I've been doing this for years too -- just squeezing the moisture out of my hair with a towel.  I never comb it.  I have still been adding "The Conditioner" by Paul Mitchell after I'm finished with the washing, but I don't work it through my hair, pulling the hair.  I just scrunch it in and then let my hair air dry.  I never use a hair dryer. 

I am a product junkie, usually using about 4 different things in my hair after it's been washed with shampoo.  I haven't felt the need to do so with the No Poo.  It feels like there is product in my hair and it is curling to the root.  The biggest difference I've noticed, however, is the volume.  Now, I am a product of the 80's, graduating high school in '89, so needless to say, I love big hair.   The increased volume rocks!

My scalp feels much less itchy and dry and I'm going 7 days without washing.  In the morning, I just spray it with some lavender water.  The first batch I made had way too much lavender and weighted my hair down.  A couple of drops has worked great though.  Just spray and scrunch. 

I have heard great things about using coconut oil as a conditioner, so I'll let you know how that works.  There are a lot of recipes out there.  The most basic No Poo is the baking soda and then the apple cider vinegar rinse.  Just play with it and see what works for you.  I'm curious about how this works for people with oily hair.  Feel free to post your experience with No Poo here to help others figure it out.

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Baby "Milestones" are Stupid

I received a message from one of my former students today in distress over her family comparing her baby to her sister's baby, who is just two weeks younger. I have a feeling a lot of us can relate to this.

"I'm starting to receive concern from family members about Ellie being slow to hit milestones. She is a happy, alert, curious baby, but she does not sit unassisted yet, and she is nowhere near crawling. She is 7 1/2 months old. Of course all the concerned people are trying to figure out why she is "delayed" and pointing fingers at: too much breastfeeding, lack of solid food, the fact that she doesn't sleep in her own room or know how to "self-soothe," or the fact that I carry her too much.

I doubt everyone would be so concerned, except that Ellie is being directly compared to her cousin (my sister's baby) who is exactly 2 weeks younger. He has been sitting and crawling for weeks, and now he is starting to pull up on furniture to a standing position. He is formula-fed, started solids at 4 months, and was trained to sleep in his own crib (in his own room). My sister is also careful not to pick him up "too much" so as not to "spoil" him. So those methods now look more successful than my methods.

Anyway, I just wondered if you had a blog post about this (or maybe if you wanted to write one!), or if you had any other info about it, so that I could send a link or something to the relatives that are bugging me."

Give that boy a ribbon!  Oh wait, the ribbon goes to the mom, right?

When my first baby was little, I remember comparing him to every baby that was remotely close to his age.  The only thing he did "early" was sit up.  He was 5 months old and fat as could be.  He looked like a bowling ball.  I think that is the only reason he did sit up!  I was so relieved when he got his first tooth at 9 months.  He finally started crawling at 10 months.  In fact, my earliest crawler was 9 months.  Of four children, my earliest walker was 13 months.

As you could probably guess, my babies, like this mama's baby, were all carried extensively in the sling.  I was constantly talking to them.  They were learning language and engaged in all kinds of  activities they otherwise probably wouldn't have been from a stroller or car seat.

I have read -- and maybe this was made up by someone who wanted to make parents of "slow" babies feel better -- that babies who do things later tend to be soaking up more around them.  They tend to speak sooner and often more clearly.  I do think that when they are engaged in whatever activity their caregiver is engaged in, they are preoccupied.  When they are left "alone" they find ways to occupy themselves, often finding out what their body can do.  This is so not true of some babies and I'll probably incite a riot with that statement.   Babies who do things early are more focused on doing than learning.   Like I said, I have no idea if that has any merit whatsoever.  As we all know, babies are all so different.  They do things when they are ready.

I was concerned about one of my kids being dyslexic when she was small.  I took her in and they wouldn't even give me the time of day.  They said at that age  -- she was about pre-K -- the spectrum was enormous.  They said by 3rd grade that gap narrows significantly. 

I've always felt like, who cares if one kid can read at 4, or crawl at 6 months, or eat solid food at 4 months, or walk at 12 months!  It doesn't mean they are smarter or better than the next kid.  It also doesn't mean that you are a better mom!  Once they are talking, walking, feeding themselves, swinging on the swings, playing tag on the playground, playing video games, Facebooking with their friends, and downloading music on their ipod, no one cares about these milestones.  It's like due dates.   40 weeks is an estimated time of arrival.  As we know, it means little. 

Ultimately, those milestones, in my opinion, are kinda stupid.  I think a mom knows when something is not right.  Those milestones, like fetal kick counts, make a mom super paranoid, almost always unnecessarily.  If you do feel that something is not quite right, visit with your pediatrician about your concerns.  Follow your gut, but not what the kid next door is doing!  Don't compare your baby with other babies.  For that matter, don't compare your teenager with other teenagers!

A couple of years ago I had to tell one of my students to put the books away and just focus on her baby.  She was making herself crazy with all the things her baby should be doing, or parenting exactly the way the book said was the right way.  At some point, you have to just look at you, your kid, and your situation and do what works for your family.  Some things sound great in a book but just don't play out that way in your real life.  I experienced this quite a bit with my babies. 

As for my former student's message?  I feel bad for the other kid.  He's not getting breastmilk, he's choking down solid food, not getting held nearly as much as his cousin, and he sleeps alone.  Follow your instincts, Mama!  You are doing a fabulous job.  And your baby is so lucky to be parented with so much love.

For the record, none of my kids read at the age of 4, but they all read now.

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A Penny A Load!

I have a great post I'm working on, but the laundry soap got brought up this week - and since we are dogsitting this weekend, - I think I'm going to take the opportunity to make this be the weekly post!  I feel like I'm cheating a bit, but I hope this will be useful for you, especially in these economic times.

I've been making my own detergent for about 2 or 3 years now.  I can afford laundry detergent.  I don't know why I keep doing this!  I guess because I can.  I also can my own beans, but I could buy them at the store too.  I like being self-reliant.  I can make yogurt, too, but I don't really think I save money on that one, so I don't do it.  But I could if I had to! And I love that feeling, of knowing I am resourceful.

I posted on my Facebook page this week that I make my own detergent and promised I'd post my recipe here. 

Ingredients:

3.1 oz bar Ivory soap

1 cup Borax

1/2 cup Arm & Hammer Super Washing Soda (found at Kroger)

Water

Tools:

5 gallon container

Cheese grater

small bowl

stove pot

long stirring spoon (I got mine at a restaurant supply store.)

Instructions:

Pour 5 cups of water in the stove pot and heat it just shy of boiling.  You want the water hot enough to be able to melt the soap, but not hot enough to boil over.  While the water is warming up, use the cheese grater to shred the bar of soap.  Add the shredded soap to the pot of heater water and stir the mixture until the soap is completely melted.

Once the soap is melted, pour 3 gallons of hot water into in 5-gallon bucket.  To the 3 gallons of hot water, stir in the melted soap mixture.  Once it's mixed, add the 1/2 cup super washing soda and stir until it's dissolved.  Pour in 1 cup borax and stir again until dissolved.  Lots of stirring!

You can add essential oils to your laundry detergent to make it smell good, but I never have.

Cover the container and place it somewhere it won't be disturbed.  Let it cool overnight.  It will begin to gel as it cools.  You'll want to put it in smaller containers.  I stir mine once it is "set" though because it does better in my new washer.  There will not be suds in your washer using homemade laundry detergent.  This was hard for me to get used to.  I don't like to pour it directly on my clothes either, as it has left white "residue."  I put the soap in the washer and let it run for a bit and then add the clothes.  Works great that way.

Use 4 oz, or 1/2 cup, per load.  One recipe yields 442 oz which should get you through 110 loads of laundry!  The breakdown, price-wise, is about a penny per load.  Not bad.

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